From: Philippa Chapman (Glastonbury, Somerset, UK.) Date: Sun, 23 Feb 1997 15:00 +0000 Subject: Looking-glass Limbo, part 9/10 LOOKING-GLASS LIMBO PART 9 'Let the windsong be our lovesong and the windsong make us one.' Adrian Snell. Start note: if you've found this by accident, be warned. Adult scene imminant. Viola blushed and made to cover herself. "Don't, please....you're beautiful. You're all my sweetest fantasies come true...but even if you weren't, I'd love you." I moved my right hand to cover her breast. Viola gasped, her eyes darkening with the beginnings of desire. She looked down at me again. "Forgive me, but....*can* we? Is it possible?" "I intend to try, darling. At the very least, we can find pleasure together....I feel as if my whole life has been leading up to this moment." Viola's face became radiant and tender. She bent towards me again and we shared another long, deep kiss. Again the world shifted under me. Well, if I was back in a man's body......but something felt different, somehow. I looked up. We were surrounded by acres of blue nothingness on all sides. Viola's face grew puzzled, then she noticed our surroundings. "I've never been here before, and yet I *know* it. It's a special part of the place between the leaps." I had noticed something else as well. "Viola, my darling, look at us!" She looked and her blush returned. We were back inside our own bodies - and naked. I smiled gently at her. "I think we have finally been given permission to have a proper honeymoon!" I pulled her closer, Viola eagerly moving half-way to meet me. She was silk and fire in my arms and her skin smelt of roses. Her hands travelled in harmony with mine, stroking, caressing and exploring. "You are the most gorgeous, handsome man I've ever seen and I adore you!" Viola murmured. I stilled her hands with mine for a moment. Her huge, dark blue eyes met mine. My desire for her became almost overwhelming. "I've already told you that you're beautiful, but it bears repeating.....and demonstrating." I began by kissing her neck and working downwards. Viola arched under me, then wrapped her legs around me as I continued. "Sam!.....You're driving me crazy!" I could feel it, but I smiled in pleasure just the same. "And if I do this?" I asked, moving back up her and touching her intimately, finding to my surprise and delight that she was ready. Viola cried out of the heat of her desire. "*Please*," she whispered. Her hand touched me, and it was I who had to bite my lip, it felt so good. I covered her eagerly and her hips tilted towards mine. "I love you." My voice came out in a hoarse whisper, then our eyes met and I gently closed the last gap between us. Viola pulled my mouth down to hers. When we kissed, it was just as beautifully overwhelming as ever, but now there was something more. Not just desire; that was there too. As we moved together, I felt our spirits or souls touch in a way I'd never experienced before. This was what making love should be like....for everyone. The pleasure, heat and desire between us became deeper and higher, till I thought it wasn't possible to feel such intensity and still be alive. Then it kept on climbing within us and around us and between us. I felt Viola go over the top and at last I plunged with her, soaring on a white-hot cloud of ecstasy, then falling softly and gently back down to earth. Viola's legs held me tightly as I lay on top of her, trying to remember how to breathe with something approaching normality. I lifted my mouth away from hers gently. Her lips were swollen from our long passionate kiss. "Don't go away," she whispered softly,"You feel so good next to me." I kissed her lips with infinite tenderness. "Okay, my darling. I'll stay right here as long as I can," I knew deep inside me that we had shared ecstasy together, but I found the words to let her know it,"I think we touched a little piece of heaven together." Viola smiled with joy and contentment. "Yes, Sam, we did. You took me higher than I've ever been before." I rolled us both over onto our sides and began to stroke her hair. "I like that; you did that before when I fell asleep in your arms." "Mmmm," I murmured,"And it's about to happen again." Viola snuggled up to me and I felt the tiredness of utter contentment sweep both of us away. I don't know how long we slept; time has no reality in that place. I only know that I woke up refreshed, with renewed desire beginning to come alive inside me. Viola stirred in my arms and kissed me while she was still half asleep. The flames rose higher. Her hands moved languidly over me and found me waiting for her. Viola's eyes shot open and she began to blush. "Sam, I was dreaming about you!" I grinned at her. "Keep right on dreaming, my love! I'm right here, ready to fulfil those dreams." I did briefly wonder if the second time might be not quite as beautiful as the first, but I needn't have worried. We took longer reaching that wonderful place, but we got there just the same. So it continued; making love, sleeping and just talking, wrapped in each other's arms. We didn't need to eat or drink. Our only hunger was the natural one for each other. Sometimes we walked together, just holding hands and sharing ourselves without distractions or fear. All the time our love grew stronger and the bond between us deepened. "How long do you think we've been here?" Viola asked once as we lay in each other's arms. "Since time has no meaning here, that's a question I can't answer, darling. We haven't eaten or drunk a thing since we got here, but neither of us feels the need of food or drink." Viola's brow furrowed. "Well, you can call me silly if you want to, but it *feels* like weeks rather than hours or days; it just seems that way because of all the sleep periods we've had." "Yes, I understand. But I bet that when we return to the real world, no-one but us will know that we've been gone." "What about Scherzo and Ziggy? They both have connections to null space. If *this* place is like that, they might know about our absence. Apart from the colour, it's just like the place where I rescued you." I nodded slowly. "There *is* that," I conceded,"We'll just have to wait and see." I had just finished speaking when a silver and light blue rippling appeared directly above us. "That's a leap, isn't it?" "I *think* so. Do we go through?" Viola spoke wistfully. "As nice as it would be to stay here for all eternity with you, we have to if we ever want to get home and see Al and Beatrice sparking off each other again!" I turned to Viola and kissed her one last time and felt the leap take us away from our own special honeymoon. I was in a kitchen....but a very strange one. There were only a limited number of up-to-date appliances. A kettle whistled on the stove. I removed it gingerly and found a mat to place it on. In front of me, on the kitchen table was a small almost spherical tea-pot with a cane handle. Oriental. I made the tea with the boiling water in the kettle, then looked for cups or mugs. Whoever lived here liked tea in the authentic oriental style, because the tea-cups had no handles and were made of delicate blue and white china. I put everything on the little tray provided, then went in search of another human face. I found the other occupant of the tiny apartment asleep in the bedroom. She was unmistakably Chinese. Her long dark hair spilled out across the pillow as she opened her eyes and greeted me with a stream of Chinese. If it had been Japanese, I'd have been fine. As it was, I could hardly make out a single word I could latch onto. I smiled politely and put the tray down on the bedside table. The lady swung her legs over the far side of the bed. She - and I - were both wearing Chinese pyjamas with knots down the front instead of buttons. What to do now? Al, where are you? She stretched, yawned, then froze and looked about her warily. My heart skipped a beat. I walked cautiously around the bed and touched her shoulder. Even as I did so, it was Viola who turned to me with warmth and love shining in her eyes. "Sam!" she exclaimed, jumping up into my arms,"I thought for one horrible moment I was stranded again." I gave her a heartfelt kiss. She was warm and real in my arms. We fell on the bed, laughing with delight and joy, holding each other and rolling over and over until desire took over. I pulled the covers back over us and we began to make our own little world in the semi-darkness. Making love in bed was just as wonderful and satisfying as it had been before. "My goodness," Viola said afterwards,"What if Al and Beatrice could see us now!" I smiled at her in the darkness. "That's why we're under here.....I didn't want any sudden interruptions, especially not for our first time in a proper bed." Viola giggled and played teasingly with the hair on my chest. "Sam Beckett, I do believe you're getting cheeky!" "It's you, darling. You've brought so much sunshine into my life. I could say *anything* with the trust we've built up together." There came a sudden, polite, masculine cough from beside the bed. "I...I know I shouldn't be eavesdropping on you, but we *do* need to talk. Are you....I mean, should I come back later?" I popped my head above the covers and Al came very close to blushing. "If you'd arrived five minutes ago, Al....." I trailed off significantly. "Ah...well. Is that, I mean, I hope I heard Viola's voice in there?" Viola had managed to struggle into her pyjama jacket and sat beside me, wriggling into the pants. She smiled broadly at Al's unease. "It certainly *is* me, Al. What's the problem?" Al tried to be businesslike, but his delight got the better of him. "Well, for a start, you're in China.....oh, damn, I can't do this; I've just broken in on your honeymoon and I can see you're both disgustingly happy and all I want to do is hug you and congratulate you both; you certainly both deserve to find happiness together." "Thank-you, Al, you're a dear," Viola replied,"But we ought to reveal that we've already had a long honeymoon.....*elsewhere*." Al came close to dropping his handlink in surprise and the look on his face was a picture. It soon moved back into a smile of welcome when Beatrice arrived. He blew her a kiss, which she returned. They exchanged another of their deep and meaningful glances. Al pulled his attention back to his handlink and Beatrice greeted Viola. "Back to the leap, everyone. As I said, you're in China and it's June. Ziggy doesn't know which year yet, but it's within the last fifteen years. You've leaped into a young married couple who work in the local factory, but today must be a day off, because you have to travel to Peking today. The trouble is, we don't have easy access to Chinese and I know I can't help you. Vietnamese wouldn't do, and I don't intend resurrecting what I remember for *anybody*." Beatrice's face softened in sympathy, and would have touched Al on the arm, but her hand failed to connect. "It's alright, darling. Believe me, I understand. My brother was a reporter in Cambodia when Pohl Pot started throwing his weight about." Al looked at her and another veil between them disappeared. I think I guessed at that point that they were going to bring healing to each other as well as everything else. Viola had glanced down and was fiddling with one of the knots on her pyjamas. When she spoke her voice was hushed and came close to cracking. "Beatrice has hardly mentioned her brother before. What Dan saw drove him crazy. I don't know if he will ever completely recover....." I put my arms around Viola and held her close, kissing her hair. When I felt that she had had enough space, I spoke softly against her head. "But what are we going to do about the Chinese? I have no idea where to start....I've only learnt Japanese, which I don't *think* can help us." Viola pulled away from me and the light came back into her eyes. "I've got an ace back home. Wei-wei!" I looked confused. Viola continued, "Don't you remember....Professor StJohn's wife. I'm sure she'd translate for us *and* help us speak enough to get by. All Beatrice needs to do is set it up. It'll cause problems to the national grid, getting the extra power, but we simply can't do without her." We turned back to Beatrice and Al. Beatrice had been speaking in a soft whisper to Al and her eyes were full of tears. Al was clearly frustrated at not being able to hold her and comfort her. "One day, rosa mia, I *swear* I'm going to love all those tears away." "I know, my darling. And I will do the same for yours, if you'll let me." "*Let* you? I want to *drown* in your arms......." Al broke off when he realised that he had an audience and covered his discomfort by burying himself in his handlink. But he couldn't maintain the discipline, because he kept looking back at Beatrice who was simply *glowing* with love for him. Viola and I reluctantly shared her idea with them both. Beatrice managed to pull out a reasonable show of efficiency, but she still yearned towards Al. In the end, she had to go back to effect the changes we needed. "Al, I love you so much." she whispered, just before she disappeared. Al watched the spot where she had been for some moments, then ran his hand through his hair. "My goodness, I do hope you get back soon, Sam. It's exquisite torture for both of us." "I hope so too, Al. You deserve happiness after all your loyalty to me." After Al had left us, I turned back to Viola and stroked her face with my hand. "It's going to take Beatrice some time, isn't it?" Viola didn't quite catch my drift. "Yes, I suppose a good hour or so....we've got time to get dressed *and* have breakfast before she and Al return." I drew her closer. "That wasn't *exactly* what I had in mind." Viola's eyes widened, then she smiled joyfully. "Sam, will you *ever* cease to surprise me?" Her eyes danced at me as she began to return my caresses. "I hope not, darling...." I replied, before words became redundant. As it was, Beatrice didn't return for over two hours, giving us more than enough time to complete our lovemaking *and* get dressed rather hurriedly. We hadn't quite made it through breakfast in the tiny kitchen when she arrived. With her was a delicately beautiful Chinese woman in her fifties. I was surprised to be able to hear her when she spoke. Her voice was soft and warm with beautiful diction. "I *am* pleased to see you again, Viola. Your hosts are just fine; her name is Lu and he is Xiang. They speak Mandarin, which is fine, because that is the language I know best apart from English. You know that surnames don't always work the same as in English-speaking countries, but effectively you are Mr and Mrs Donfang. Eddie sends his regards to you." She broke off and looked lovingly to her left. "My goodness, is he *there*?" I asked, eagerly. Wei-wei put out her hand and Edward StJohn appeared. I blinked, then grinned. It was *him*! He looked up at me questioningly, then turned to Wei-wei and said something I couldn't hear. Beatrice interpreted for him. "He was just telling Wei-wei that he was glad to have the pleasure of seeing the famous Doctor Samuel Beckett at last. He can be *so* sweetly formal when he puts his mind to it, can't you, hen?" The last remark slid over StJohn like water off a duck's back. I had a feeling that nothing much would phase him. Typical British stiff upper lip combined with an endearing eccentricity. Just like I remembered him. My smile widened. "You can tell *Eddie* that I met him on a leap; but he wouldn't remember it. The timelines have changed a lot since then. It's good to see he's still attached to time travel." Viola looked up at me questioningly, but she could see that I wasn't going to say any more, so she left off asking. "You shouldn't call him 'Eddie', Sam. Only Wei-wei's allowed to do that. He's going to let go of her hand now and get on with persuading the national grid to part with more of it's power for us. It's possible we may only be able to get one of the two of us through to you, so because Wei-wei's more vital to you, I may not always be here. Please explain to Al if I can't." "Yes, of course, Beatrice," Viola replied,"We understand." Wei-wei spent the next hour teaching us some basic phrases and helping us find our money and travel documents. Finally, we had everything we needed and headed for the station on bicycles. Ours were only two of hundreds whizzing along the roads that day, along with cars and the odd farm-cart pulled by oxen. When we reached the station, Wei-wei drip-fed me with the right words to ask for a return to Beijing, as she called it, and we got on, leaving our bikes parked at the station. We spent a good proportion of the journey propped up in the train corridor with umpteen others. The fact that this meant we could hold each other all the time was just the icing on the cake. Wei-wei had warned us that public demonstrations of love were generally frowned on, so we were discreet. The other passengers realised that we were wrapped up in our own private world. "They are saying you must be newly-weds." Wei-wei supplied. I smiled. "They wouldn't be far wrong, either." She gave me the words to tell everyone around us that we had been married a week, and they nodded and smiled politely and generously, then left us alone. It was early evening when we arrived in Peking. There was a strange atmosphere about the place. Something didn't *smell* right, somehow. Viola's eyes narrowed. "There's something odd going on. A parade, or a religious celebration, or something like that." I nodded thoughtfully and turned to Wei-wei. She was clutching Beatrice's handlink and had gone white. She kept saying the same thing, over and over again, looking at the read-out in disbelief. "What is it, Wei-wei?" I asked gently. "It's terrible, Sam. It says here that you will die tonight. It's the 3rd of June, 1989. The blood-bath at the Gate of Heavenly Peace. Tianemen Square." Before I could even formulate a reply, Al was there. "Sam.....she's right. Ziggy gives it 99%. We've run every possibility, even getting back on the train, but every time, you die. I really don't know what to suggest. I've even contemplated leaping in myself, but you'd die when we change places. I don't want to lose you like this, dammit!" His eyes were dark with anger and grief. Viola clung to me in shock. "There has *got* to be a way out. There *has* to be." I clung to my words like a lifeline, then I thought again,"What about Viola? Is she going to die too?" "Ziggy can't - or won't - say. She's already grieving your loss and nothing we do will shake her out of it. What about Scherzo?" He turned to Wei-wei with tenderness. She was crying. "It says here that when Sam dies......Viola has a better than 80% probability of going home. I'm sorry, this is terrible....." Her voice trailed off and she disappeared. All of us were in varying measures shocked, angry or close to tears. Viola's voice shook when she spoke. "You're not going to die just so I can go home. I'd rather die with you." "I don't intend dying, not if I can help it, darling. If we stick together and Al watches our backs, there's simply *got* to be a way out of this. If Beatrice joins us, we'll be even stronger." We proceeded cautiously forward towards the fateful square. Whatever guise death came in would have to get past all of us. Ahead was a large crowd of fellow workers, marching towards the square with banners. "I should join up with them, Sam. Safety in numbers and all that. There were several marches like this of workers showing solidarity with the students in the square. It *should* have worked, but the leaders just refused to listen to popular opinion and the cry for change. Reform is not a good word in communist vocabulary. There is still no accurate record of how many people died. All those young lives wasted! It's not right, Sam." Al sounded mad, but I could see unshed tears in his eyes. "I know, Al," I said softly,"If I could save just one of them....." A young man plucked at my arm. "You speak English?" I looked down into the noble, earnest face. He was simply attired in a white shirt and black pants and was carrying a large brown paper bag. "Yes....my wife and I learnt it in.....night school." The man smiled. "Do you think we will make a difference?" How could I tell him? How could I give him hope that would carry him through the next few days? "I only know we must do the best we can. Each of us can make a personal effort." "Yes," added Viola,"Every small action counts. If you do something heroic, people *will* remember." By this time, Beatrice had joined Al. Al greeted her, then checked his handlink. "Oh, my God. Sam, Viola; you've just changed history. When the tanks enter the city in daylight, this young man is going to deliberately step in front of them and make them stop for him. The pictures will move the world for years to come. 'They shall beat their swords into plowshares'....." Al's voice trailed off and I could see him crying. Beatrice was shedding tears too. "Well done." Her voice came out in a hoarse whisper. By the time we'd turned back to him, the young man had disappeared. "I didn't even get his name....." "That's the way it's meant to be. An anonymous hero in the crowd." Al wiped the tears away and gave me a deep look. He didn't need to say any more. We moved on, pushed and pulled by the crowd around us. Everything was going fine until some of them began to run. Several people around us tripped over and when I got up Viola had been swept away by the running people. I looked up at Al. "This is it, isn't it? She's been taken away so that she doesn't see me die." Al's face was grim. He looked into my eyes. "You've got maybe 15 minutes, tops. It's a bullet and it's quick. Your host dies, too - shock, I guess. This isn't damned well *fair*! We should have got you home!" Al swore loudly, using some words I'd never heard from his lips before. "Just say 'I'm sorry' to everyone, alright?" I couldn't go on any more. I stumbled over to the side of the road and sat down on the kerb. Al sat as close to me as he could. Viola ran, carried along by the demonstrators, but trying at every opportunity to get out of the rush and back to Sam. At last, after 5 minutes, she made it. She couldn't see Beatrice anywhere, so began making her way back to Sam as fast as she could. She was half-way there when a movement caught her eye. It was Beatrice. "Am I going to reach Sam in time?" "You can do more than that if you want to." Viola looked puzzled. "What do you mean?" "You can save his life." "Beatrice, you've got to tell me how." "It's like this. Did you ever find out about the other wife Sam had? It's not so unusual if you think about it. Her name's Donna and she's there, waiting for Sam to come home. If you take the bullet that's meant for Sam, *he'll* go home instead. Donna was once the love of his life, and will be again; if you are willing to trade your life for his." Viola sat down heavily on the ground. "I'd die and Sam would go home? What are the odds on that?" "I'd give them at least 95% probability." Viola stared into the distance and thought hard for a moment. Then she set her jaw and rose to her feet. "I'll do it, because I love him and I want him to be happy. Say goodbye to everyone for me and....Beatrice, don't stop loving Al. I'll be a little happier if I know you and Al are really going to make it together." As Viola turned away, a look of stunned surprise crossed Beatrice's features. I saw Viola running towards me. There was barely a minute left. She threw herself at me, pushing me to the ground. I heard the shot at the same time and Viola cried out in pain. I turned her over and yelled. "Oh, no.....oh, God, NO!" Blood spread slowly across her upper chest. The bullet had got her lung. If it had been me, I'd have got it in the heart. Viola coughed painfully, then smiled up at me while I tried to stem the bleeding. "It's okay, Sam. You're going home....to *her*." Al hunkered down beside me, his face wracked with pain. "Who told you this, kid?" "Beatrice," Viola whispered, looking towards where she was standing. Then it happened. Beatrice's face changed, darkened and she turned into a terribly scarred, but very alive Thames. We all looked at him in horror. "I am right, you know. She traded her life for yours. But there's no Donna. I lied about *that*. Now I am satisfied you will have a long and miserable life." Viola looked at him, taking in the implications of what he had done. "You bastard!" she whispered,"You utter bastard!" I think in that moment I loved her more than ever. She was so brave. Thames disappeared, triumphant and unrepentant. I looked at Viola, pain already filling my heart. "You're going home, darling." I felt the tears running down my face. "How can this Odysseus go home without his Penelope?" Viola smiled wistfully, then winced again. "Not Penelope, my dearest.....Euridice." She raised her hand to touch my face, then she went limp in my arms and I leaped. I howled my way back to reality. I didn't care where I was. I slammed my fists on the floor beneath me over and over until they bled. Pain, anger and loss stormed through me like a hurricane. I felt a firm hand on my shoulder. "It's okay Sam. I understand. I could kill him, too." Warm arms enfolded me and I realised it was Al. I clung to him like a dying man, dimly realising that I *had* come home, but it held no joy for me at all. Al held me until I had poured out everything inside me. I don't know how long it took, but I know I came to a place of relative numbness that enabled me to stand up. I took my first real look at him. He had been crying, too. I hugged him wordlessly. No words were either needed or appropriate, not now. "Come with me, Sam. We all know what happened. It's been three days for us since you leaped. Ziggy wants to speak with you especially." I walked slowly out of the Acceleration Chamber with Al. "WELCOME HOME, FATHER," Ziggy said,"VIOLA IS NOT DEAD, MERELY LOST." End note: Okay, take a deep breath. Last part coming up. I wrote the last bit *before* seeing 'The Langoliers'. Obviously someone else had seen how well Dean can do the clever deduction stuff (and therefore, Al....).