From: geiger@niktow.canisius.edu (Tucson Al) Newsgroups: alt.tv.mst3k,alt.ql.creative Subject: "A Not Too Distant Future : Part VI" (Parody FIinale) Message-Id: <2814@niktow.canisius.edu> Date: 28 Jun 93 10:48:27 GMT Followup-To: poster Organization: Canisius College, Buffalo NY. 14208 Lines: 104 Xref: cronkite.cisco.com alt.tv.mst3k:4673 alt.ql.creative:500 And now, for something completely different... "A Not Too Distant Future : Part VI" Sam looked at the machinery in wonder. "How'd you guys ever build this? Where'd you get the idea?" Crow answered with a flourish. "Well, in the SOL video libraries, there are a lot of old Sci-Fi TV shows. There's one that Tom and I watched called 'Captain Galaxy.' It's all about this guy who flies around in space and fights evil. He even has a cool sidekick named Future Boy." "Yeah. Hey, Joel, recently you've reminded me a little bit of Future Boy," said Tom. "I don't know why, but the resemblance is there." Sam did his best to ignore this as he continued to examine the equipment. "Anyway," Crow continued. "They used to read a letter at the end of each show. One day some stupid, snot-nosed kid wrote in and asked about time travel." Tom took up the story. "Being a space age genius, Captain Galaxy answered the brat's question easily. He said something to the effect of 'Your life is a string that you move along in one direction only. But what happens if you cut that string out of the larger weave that is the Universe and ball it up. Now the string touches itself in all sorts of places and you can move from any one section of the string to another, just moving to any time within your own life time." "Theoretically," said Sam, trying to suppress a grin of pride. "Well, yeah. No one's ever tried it before," said Crow. "Hurry it up, Joel," complained Doctor Forrester. "Yes, sir," said Sam. "Now, Joel, if you'd allow us to demonstrate?" asked Crow tentatively. The Imaging Chamber door opened and an out-of-breath ran through it. "Don't do it, Sam. Ziggy says that you will leap again, but that there's a good chance that we'd lose contact with you forever." Sam considered. The machine began humming as Crow manipulated the controls. In the background, Crow and Tom were discussing where to send their victim, uh, volunteer. "How's about we send him back in time a week and leave him in the middle of a desert?" suggested Tom. "Yeah, just like in the movie!" agreed Crow forcefully. "Let's see, New Mexico has a desert, right?" "I guess so," said Tom uncertainly. "It's better than nothing." "Come on, Sam," said Al warningly. "You can't seriously be considering getting into that thing, can you?" "Why not? That's how it all started, right?" "But Joel's not even in the Waiting Room, anymore. He escaped somehow and we can't find him. We've stationed guards everywhere, we've implemented all kinds of screwy search patterns, but nothing seems to be working," worried Al. "Did you say everywhere?" asked Sam. "Yeah, why?" wondered Al. Before Sam could answer, the Satellite of Love collided with a sizable meteorite. It didn't do much damage to the structure itself, but it did knock its occupants around quite a bit. Unable to steady himself, Sam was thrown headlong into Tom and Crow's mini-Accelerator. In a flash of blue, green, and orange plaid, Sam vanished. "Uh-oh," said Crow. "I think we did something wrong." Seconds later a form began to materialize on the Accelerator platform. The man resembled Joel only slightly, but that didn't matter. Their invention actually worked! The control console disappeared amid a flash of sparkling plaid. It appeared next to Dr. Forrester on the viewscreen. "Well, my little 'phages, I guess my invention works better than yours after all. My matter transporter was able to grab you temporal/spatial thingy. Now, I have both and you don't have any." "Nyah nyah nyah-nyah nyah," taunted Frank. "Hey, wait a minute," said Dr. F, noticing the figure on the platform for the first time. "You're not Joel." The figure grinned and stepped off the platform. "No. I'm a security guard from the Project. I heard what you guys do up here and I think this is gonna be fun." The sparkling plaid/arcing blue lightning receded from his view just as the roaring sound died away. If looks meant anything, he was back in the Quantum Leap Accelerator Chamber. He was finally home. It would've been nice if he remember why he had leapt. One second he was on the Satellite of Love, looking at a miniature version of the PQL Accelerator, the next moment he was here. As he half expected, his memories of the past leaps began to fade. Soon, they would seem no more than stories told to him by somebody else, a long time ago. Sam was just coming out of the Accelerator Chamber when a person who looked just like him rushed past. The other guy had even been dressed in a Fermi-suit. Before Sam could stop him, the door to the Accelerator slid shut and the sound of rising power could be heard. After a few seconds, the door re-opened. The Accelerator Chamber was empty. Back at Project : Quantum Leap, technicians were running everywhere. Sam Beckett had returned. After nearly six years lost in the time-stream, he was home. Too bad he was in the body of somebody named Joel. (At least that's what it said on his red jumpsuit.) T H E E N D ? That's it. I've single-handedly (with both hands) fixed the ending of "Mirror Image," figured out how Joel is going to leave the show, and included references to "Rock Climbing" and "Future Boy." What do you think, sirs? -- Doug "Rock climbing, Joel. Rock climbing." geiger@niktow.cs.canisius.edu