This is my first time posting here, and I thought this was pretty
funny, but not that great (it was the only thing I could think of). When
I think of something better I will post:

"Sam, Ziggy says you are here to give these kids a spoonful of sugar
to make the medicine go down."


I just thought of another:

"Sam, Ziggy says that you are a bartender, and everybody knows your name."


and for those of you that are horror buffs:

"Sam, Ziggy says that you are a famous author, and the woman that lives
in this house is your number one fan!"  :O