From: lalsoong@sprynet.com (Christine Wirick ) Newsgroups: alt.tv.quantum-leap.creative Subject: Paradox Delusion 16/23 Date: Sat, 22 Feb 1997 18:59:48 GMT Organization: Sprynet News Service Message-Id: <33204130.1278542@news.sprynet.com> Nntp-Posting-Host: ad70-113.compuserve.com Mime-Version: 1.0 Content-Type: text/plain; charset=us-ascii Content-Transfer-Encoding: 7bit Chapter Sixteen: Sleep took a long time coming that night for Sam, and when he finally did sleep, he slipped into Matthew's persona again. As Matthew, he climbed out of a pit. His throat was parched, and his hands bloody. He struggled against the soft soil losing almost as much ground as he gained. Several times he nearly fell to the bottom where he would probably break his neck. Then miraculously he reached the top, collapsing as he fought to remain conscious. Got to get out of here, he thought, knowing the Nazi guards would be making their way back soon. He stood on shaky legs and began running barefoot across the rocky terrain. His final step brought the world up in a fiery blaze. Matthew flew several yards before landing hard and smacking his head against a mound of rocks. Several seconds passed by before he understood what had happened. He felt the blood flowing from his open wound and shivered from the heat loss. Extreme agony set in and Sam, as Matthew, realized that no one was around to help him; he was going to die slowly and painfully. He screamed with his last ounce of energy and awoke from the too-real nightmare. For several minutes, Beckett lay terrorized in bed, unable to move. He heard the phone downstairs ring three times, then stop. A minute later, Raymond came up to tell him that Charles Sheffield wanted to talk with him. "Hello," Sam said after he came downstairs and picked up the phone. "Mr. Marland, what is going on?" Charles asked acidly. "Am I paying you good money just to live in my house? What have you been doing?" "Well, Mr. Sheffield," Sam began, "the ghosts haven't exactly been cooperative. They have already tried to kill me twice." "I'm sorry to hear that," Charles said, momentarily taken aback. "This is just great. I'm going to end up placing the damn house on the market and with the word spreading to more and more people that it's haunted, I may never sell it--or sell it for so little that I might as well give it away." "Mr. Sheffield, have you ever served during a war?" Sam asked. The reply came after a long pause. "No, I haven't, not that it's any of your business. I don't see how that has any bearing on the real estate value of my house." "Then you wouldn't understand the turmoil Ben Simms is going through. Helping him deal with his post- traumatic syndrome is the key to convincing him to leave your house. Now that will certainly help your cause, but quite frankly, I'm most concerned with Ben's spiritual being. I'll call you when anything new develops." Sam hung up, suddenly feeling more confident having given Sheffield a piece of his mind. Maybe the man would fire him, but Sam didn't think so. Sheffield was too desperate and probably wouldn't want to waste the time it would take to find someone else willing to take on the case. I have to get out of here, Beckett thought. This has to end soon. He wondered who would return first: Al or Ben? I can't wait, he decided. Ziggy said that my best odds would be for me to call Ben before he attacked, so I could distract him. I have to try and hopefully Al will show up to help me. He'll know something's wrong. Feeling increasingly vulnerable, Sam decided to search through Patrick's belongings for any items that could potentially serve as barriers against negative activities. He found a small box nestled in a corner of the psychic's travel bag and when he opened it up, he found two chains with birthstones, one for August and the other for March. Beckett grinned. Patrick had been thinking ahead. Removing the chains, Sam slipped both of them around his neck. He felt better immediately if only they served to help him relax. "You've decided to conduct another Levels session?" Raymond asked. Beckett hadn't even realized that Raymond was standing behind him until the assistant spoke. He turned around, and said, "Your perceptiveness continues to amaze me. Did you also know that Patrick and I are going to invite Karen this time?" "No, but I think it is a good idea. However, you should eat breakfast first. Meg's already in the kitchen making a special breakfast." "What is she fixing this time?" Sam asked, his mouth already watering. "Blueberry pancakes, sage sausage patties and fresh-squeezed orange juice." "She's too good to us," Sam said as they walked into the kitchen to find hot meals already on the table waiting for them. "You're too good to us," he reiterated so Meg could hear. "I know what we're about to face, especially you, Sam, and I want to be sure that we at least have a good meal in us before we face the challenge." Meg sat down and gestured for the men to join her. "How comfortable are you with yesterday's lesson on safety barriers? Were you able to resolve your doubts?" "I think I'm beginning to gain perspective on everything. The bath oils certainly helped. I chose this outfit, figuring I needed all the positive psychic energy I could muster today." He pointed at his clothes, a blue plaid shirt with light blue pants. Next he pointed to his right hand, which had a ring on the forefinger. "I found this in one of Patrick's side pockets. Patrick must be a Sagittarius." He indicated the topaz setting. "I don't have anything with my birthstone, so I figured it wouldn't hurt to try Patrick's birthstone, since we are connected." Smiling at Beckett, Meg said, "You're doing beautiful." "Sam and Patrick are going to conduct another Levels session today. This time, they're inviting Karen Simms. Hopefully Karen can provide some necessary information." "That ought to be the easy part," Sam said, "but how do we deal with the evil spirits when they show up next time? Al says that our computer, Ziggy, has predicted they will show up against sometime today." "I believe he's right," Meg replied, with no surprise in her voice. "You must remember everything Patrick's taught you." "Remember those whose bodies you've shared through leaps," Raymond added. "Remember and concentrate on the strength each and every one of them offers you." "And remember we're here to offer our support, too, Sam," Meg said. Sam acknowledged his gratitude by squeezing Meg's hand gently. "I already had a feeling that our time is drawing near before Al showed up last night. I don't want to wait any longer than it takes to finish this meal before entering into Levels. I just know they're planning a surprise attack." "Expect the unexpected," Meg said, "and you will always be prepared." "Let's pray you're right," Raymond said, nodding toward Meg. They worked together to clean up the breakfast mess, so Sam could move on quickly to the Levels. Al arrived just as Sam was wiping down the table to tell the time traveler that Patrick was ready to begin whenever Sam was. "Al just informed me that Patrick is ready," Sam said, addressing both Meg and Raymond. "How do we know for sure that Karen knows she's welcome to join us?" "You will have to trust Patrick on that one," Raymond responded. "He will help you call her." As they wandered out into the living room, Sam said, "I don't want to do this Levels in the bedroom." His companions fixed him with puzzled stares. "It may sound strange, but I have a couple of reasons. I was in the bedroom both times I was attacked. Changing how we're doing things could throw the evil spirits off. I'd also like to play the Beatles cd--at a low volume-- because I think it might help Karen feel more relaxed." "I don't see anything wrong with that," Raymond said. "Meg and I can go upstairs, and you can call us when you've finished the Levels." Before they could leave the room, the front doorbell rang. "Were either of you expecting anyone?" Meg asked as she turned to go answer the door. Both men shook their heads. With a remarkable calm, she opened it to Andrew Montgomery, who was carrying a folder. "Mr. Montgomery, what a surprise to see you here." She nearly gasped out the words, unable to control her worry. They couldn't have inexperienced players inside the house at this penultimate moment! "I'm sorry. I probably should have called first," Montgomery replied, seeming not to notice Meg's tone. "I hope I'm not interrupting anything." Sam approached them, standing behind Meg. While a part of him was glad to see Montgomery, another part of him wondered if it wasn't wrong for Montgomery to be here. They didn't know for sure when Ben or an evil spirit was going to show up again and Montgomery could be in serious danger. In fact, the man could actually be their primary target! "Mr. Montgomery, I don't mean to sound rude, but you probably shouldn't be here. Your life could be in danger if you stay." "I'm not sure I understand. Driving on the freeway every day, my life is in danger. How can my life be in danger by just coming to talk with you?" "Mr. Montgomery, whether you believe me or not, there are ghosts in this house and some of them may be evil. One of them most certainly is being coerced somehow into believing that you had an affair with his wife. It is not safe for you here! Why don't you choose a nearby restaurant and Meg and I will meet you there later for lunch." "I should have considered that," Montgomery replied slowly as he glanced around the living room. He gulped thickly as if expecting to see one of the purported ghosts. "It's just that I had a very strong urge to see this place again." He looked up toward the second floor. "It's such a beautiful house." He returned his gaze to Sam. "But you're right.. . .I shouldn't be here. Do you know where the Perkin's Restaurant is?" "I'm sure I can find it." "It's just off the by-pass as your coming into town. Why don't we meet there at twelve-thirty." "That's fine with me," Sam replied and glanced at Meg. She nodded in agreement. "We look forward to reading your answers to our questions." "Good. Have a pleasant morning," he said. Although Montgomery said it with seriousness, Beckett couldn't help but feel a bit eery about the well wish. "You, too," he simply said and closed the door as Montgomery began to walk back toward his car. As he turned around, Sam tuned into the music again. The Beatles continued to drone lightly throughout the room, singing of a "Long and Winding Road." It was appropriate, he thought, they were indeed about to travel down a long and winding road, and he wasn't sure where it would lead to. "Let's try this again," he told everyone. "I'll lay on the couch and get started. Al, you pop back into the Waiting Room and let Patrick know that I'm ready." "And Raymond and I will make a polite exit," Meg said and turned to do just that. Al waited until Sam was comfortably on the couch before popping out. This time, Sam felt confident enough to slip into Levels without his friend's help and so he began. Climbing to Level seven came with a natural ease. He really was beginning to get the hang of all this, he realized. "Hello again, my good friend," Patrick said. "Allow yourself to drift as high as possible." As Sam complied with he psychic's wishes, he asked, "How will Karen know to join us? How can she even join us?" "We will have to call for her. If she hears us--and I think she will, because she's very anxious to speak with the both of us--we will coax her forward. We can help her reach us in much the same way Al helped you the first time." "Okay. Do we just call out her name?" "No. There's more to it than that. We must use our minds fully to call out to her. If both of us concentrate on reaching her, we should have no problem making contact." "I'm ready to try that." "Good. If it helps you to speak her name aloud, that is fine. We should begin now." "Karen!" Sam exclaimed. After a moment, he realized she obviously had not heard him. Maybe I didn't put enough of my mind into it, he decided. He closed his eyes and tried to focus fully on Karen, pushing thoughts of anything else aside. "Karen!" "Dr. Beckett," Karen, barely audible, replied. "Karen," Sam replied. "Relax, listen to the sound of my voice, and let yourself slowly rise to my Level." Patrick nodded his accordance, obviously pleased with his student's progress with PSI. Sam spoke slowly, continuing to coax the ghost forward until Karen Simms came into focus. "It's good to see you again, Karen," he said. As she stared at him a bit puzzled, he realized that she had never seen his true face, nor heard his true voice. "I'm Dr. Sam Beckett. I'm the one who spoke with you yesterday." She raised her hand as if to touch him, but her fingers passed right through his face. "You're a beautiful man, Sam Beckett." Sam turned toward Patrick for guidance. Where did they begin? he asked with his expression. "Patrick?" "It is good to meet you my dear lady," the psychic said. "I am glad you asked for this meeting and that Sam agreed to it. We should accomplish a lot during this session. I must first ask you if you are willing to divulge personal information about your relationships both with your husband and Andrew Montgomery with us?" "I understand that if I don't, it would hinder your helping us find peace. I would do anything to have the Ben I fell in love with returned to me. That is, anything short of making a deal with the Devil." Sam could see the seriousness in her face, and so, obviously, could Patrick. "We won't let it come to that," Patrick promised. The time traveler allowed himself a moment to pray that Ben Simms hadn't already made a deal with the devil. Hopefully, his coercion by the evil spirits was completely involuntary. "I believe I can trust both of you," Karen said. "Where would you like me to begin?" "Why not from the point where I leaped out of Montgomery," Sam suggested. "Your father's opponent had just resigned from the election, and Montgomery--or rather I--was among the reporters fielding questions. Then there was a party afterwards. I leaped out just as you accepted an invitation to dance from your father." "If it was really you during all that time, who'd I fall in love with? You or Andrew?" "I should explain something to you," Beckett said. "When I leap into someone, many aspects of their personality still remain. Although we've technically switched places, we are very much connected. I think that is why I am able to fool others so easily into believing that I am the person I've leaped into." "I see," Karen said, growing distant. "Then it really was Andrew who I fell in love with." She appeared relieved by this conformation. Better to be in love with two men than three, Sam supposed. "You thought about having an affair, but you didn't. I believe that is because you also loved your husband very much." I meant 'love', Sam thought, realizing he had used the word in the past tense. Karen either didn't notice, or didn't feel the need to correct him. "I was quite young when I met Bennie," Karen said, rubbing thoughtfully at her chin. "I was seventeen, a senior in high school. He was only three years older than me, but when you're that young, three years is a world apart. He was in college, more experienced, more mature. I would have to admit that I quickly became quite love sick. He was all I could think about when we were apart, and when we were together, I felt as though his kisses could just eat me up and I would be in Heaven." "As you grew older, matured yourself, did your image of Ben change?" Sam asked. "Of course. I tried to deny it at first, but eventually I did figure out that Ben was only human. He was a mortal man with his own built-in faults. Did I still love him? Yes, very much. To be honest, the love I felt for him later on was not only more realistic, but deeper and more mature. We married shortly after I graduated from college at twenty-two. We bought the house where you are now staying. We had several months of honeymoon bliss. Then Ben was ordered to serve in Vietnam." "And as you said, you were very lonely during that time." "I almost fell apart when I learned he had been drafted. He promised me that no matter how many miles and how many days were between us, we would always be together. I know he meant it, but the war took that part of him away from us." "After you realized that your husband had changed, you met Andrew Montgomery, and he offered you the companionship that was lacking in your life." "Exactly. I tried to ignore my attraction to Andrew at first. I wanted to remain faithful to my husband--really I did!" "Did you see a lot of similarities between Andrew and Ben? Was that why you found yourself attracted to another man?" "I wouldn't say they were exactly alike. In fact, there were many differences between Ben and Andrew. But they were both good listeners, and they both genuinely treated me with respect and would have done anything to please me." "Did you realize that Andrew Montgomery was still in love with you?" "Still?" Karen appeared shocked. "But I'm. . . .dead." Beckett turned toward his psychic adviser, who had remained complacent for most of this exchange. He didn't know how to respond to Karen and hoped that Patrick knew what to say. "Just as you still have the memories of the man your husband was, so does Andrew Montgomery have the memories of the woman you were," Patrick explained. "He is a man who lives in the past." "That is so sad," Karen said near tears. "If he has wanted me all these years, then he hasn't opened himself up to love anyone else. I feel somehow that I led him on, that I cheated him out of a life of happiness." "Don't feel that way," Sam coaxed her. "During my leap into Andrew's life, I could tell that you were offering him friendship, nothing more." "At first, but then I fell in love with him, too." "If you don't object," Patrick began, "we should move on. I hate to rush either of you, but we don't know how much time we have." Both ghost and time traveler nodded their understanding. "Tell us about the day Ben returned from Vietnam," Patrick prodded "How did he behave?" Karen grew distant, and Sam suddenly became fearful that she would refuse to talk about that day. For a heartbeat, he forgot that she had been the one to set up this meeting and even braced himself for her abrupt leave. "My memory of that day is so hazy," she said slowly. Beckett opened his mouth to speak, but Patrick raised a hand, signalling that they should give Karen a chance to finish. "It's almost as if I wasn't there. . .or like I was watching myself from a distance." "I've encountered another leaper a few times," Sam told her, deliberately avoiding telling Karen that this other leaper was evil. "Is it possible that you were leaped into?" "Oh my God! I surely don't know." She looked away from them, trembling. The notion obviously frightened her very much. "I suppose it's possible." "I'm sorry that I'm frightening you, but for your own protection you needed to know that she exists." "This other leaper, what is she like?" Karen asked, looking Sam straight in the eyes. She meant to hear the truth! Sam hesitated, floundering for a way to not frighten Karen anymore than she already was. There was no way other than to be blunt with her, he realized, and swallowed heavily before answering. "This other leaper is nothing like me. I leap into people to set right what went wrong. Zoey, she corrupts people, turns them against each other. She's out to ruin people's lives!" "You've already been considering this possibility, haven't you?" Karen let out a violent shudder. "It makes sense. This Zoey could have impersonated me and then went out of her way to make Ben believe that Andrew and I'd had an affair. And if that's true. . .how do we convince him that it wasn't me during that time? I mean, maybe as far as he's concerned I am the one who told him all about the affair!" A long pause fell between them. "My dear lady," Patrick said, "we will do everything within our power to help you. We believe that Zoey or some other equally evil force is at work here and continues to either influence or impersonate your husband." "Impersonate! Are you telling me that that's not my Bennie--How could I not have known? If they can deceive me that easily--" "Karen," Sam began, wanting more than ever to be able to touch her, to comfort her, "these evil leapers are masters at what they do. They've made a career out of deceiving people. You cannot blame yourself for not seeing through their masquerade. Besides, we have not yet been able to determine that Zoey is involved." "But if she is how can we ever stop her?!" "I will not lie to you. It will not be easy. But we have God and hopefully, we can build enough trust in each other to resolve this situation." "What do you need me to do?" "If you could try to get through to your husband, maybe you can help us learn more about the motive and method of the evil forces involved here." Karen nodded slowly. "I will do everything within my power to get through to Ben. I only hope that these evil forces don't block my every move." "Keep your faith in God. He will guide you." "I will." Karen asked to leave after that, anxious to find her husband and to help them uncover the true nature of their common enemy. Patrick talked her slowly out of Levels. Then he and Sam slipped out of Levels simultaneously. When he came back fully into Patrick's body, Sam sat up on the couch and reflected for a moment about the session. He was glad he had decided to conduct the third Levels session and knew that Karen would be able to help them now. He was actually beginning to feel some hope that they could save Ben's soul and that he and Karen could finally crossover into the afterlife. Five minutes later, he went upstairs to find Meg. "There it is!" Meg exclaimed, pointing left and leaving Sam just barely enough time to pull into the turning lane and into the parking lot of Perkin's Restaurant. They found a free spot a ways from the front door and made their way inside. "We have a third member to our party," Sam informed the hostess as she greeted them just inside the door. Montgomery, sitting at a booth, looked up and noticing them, waved at them. "They're with me," he said just loud enough for the hostess to hear. The hostess grabbed two menus and lead them to the table. She gave them their menus and told them a waitress would be by to serve them momentarily. After Sam and Meg settled into the seat beside him, Montgomery removed a folder from his briefcase and slapped it onto the counter. "I have all the answers I could possibly provide you with inside this folder." Sam opened the folder and began browsing through the pages. A young woman in an apron walked up to their table. "Hello, my name is Molly," she told them. "I'll be your waitress today. Would either of you like to order your drinks now?" "I'll have a coffee," Sam replied, barely looking up from the folder. "An ice tea," Montgomery ordered. "I'll also have a coffee," Meg told Molly as the girl jotted the order on her pad. "Look, I know it reads like an autobiography," Montgomery apologized after the waitress had walked away. "Maybe that's what it really is, but all the answers you asked for are actually there amongst all my purple prose." "You weren't in touch with Karen after the senatorial elections, were you?" Beckett asked. He hadn't thought to ask Karen that question earlier. Perhaps that was because, he dreaded the answer. If he knew that Montgomery had went out of his way to see Karen after his leap-in, it would add to the nagging feeling that he had failed Karen. "I saw her a few times." Bull's eye! Sam may have been successful at preventing the affair, but he could do nothing about deflating Montgomery's love for Karen. "What about after her husband returned?" "Once or twice. She asked me not to come back, that she was trying to work things out with the jerk. So I backed off. It was the hardest thing I ever did--leaving her in the arms of that maniac." Sam couldn't help the doubt rising in him that the man wasn't being totally honest. He toyed with the idea that his leap objective was really to get Montgomery to confess to the affair he had with Karen Simms. No, he told himself, that's not the way it happened!" Allowed he said, "Ben Simms was not a maniac; he was a war victim and the aftershock from a war can make normal people do strange things." Molly returned with Montgomery's iced tea, two coffee cups and a pot of coffee. As she poured the coffee, she asked, "Would you like to order now?" Sam had been so caught up in dealing with Montgomery that he had forgotten to look at the menu. "What's the special of the day?" "A sirloin dinner with salad, soup and a dinner roll for $6.99." "I'll have that then, medium-well." "Why don't we all have the special," Montgomery said presumptuously. Meg eyed him funny, but then shrugged and said, "Sure, why not?" After they each chose a salad dressing and a flavor of soup, Molly left to give the order to the cook. "Andrew, please don't take this the wrong way," Sam began, "but are you being totally honest with us here? Because if you're not--" "I loved Karen too much to harass her! Do you think I want to see her continue suffering in limbo like she has for so long already?" Shamelessly, he began to cry. "I'd rather she settled matters with her husband and crossed over to Heaven--or whatever lies beyond--and remain blissfully with him. I've lived a miserable, lonely life, mostly because of the pain I caused her. I would only be more miserable if I knew I had a chance to help resolve it-- and did nothing." "Please don't blame yourself." "How can I not?" Sam noticed a few customers in their immediate area turn in their direction. A couple appeared annoyed, while others seemed curious. Their conversation halted for a long moment, until attention drew away from them. "You must keep reminding yourself that the war was responsible." "Mr. Montgomery--Andrew," Meg said, "You are, at best, only partially at fault. I agree with Patrick. The Vietnam War did cause a great deal of Ben Simms' problems. You didn't know him before the war, so that's why you would have a narrow view of who he really was. But you're a reporter--an editor now--so you should know how the war effected so many veterans." "You're right, and I wish that were enough to make me feel less guilty. My attitude shames me. I must apologize. Geez, I was a reporter long before I became an editor. We're all reporters here. We know what the Vietnam War was like. Maybe not firsthand, but we've seen enough, reported enough to know how violence corrupts. There just is no cut and dry answers to life, no definitive right or wrong. No one is completely innocent or guilty. I lie somewhere in between, sucked into life's idea of normalcy." He laughed, his tone laced with sarcasm. "What I wouldn't give now to go back in time and throw aside my morality. If I spent one night with Karen, maybe she would have chosen me over her husband. I would have taken care of her. And maybe she would still be alive today. The irony of it!" Throughout their meal, Sam realized that Montgomery didn't want to be discouraged away from his self-pity. Nothing Beckett or Meg could do or say could lessen the guilt Montgomery felt over his handling of his brief relationship with Karen Simms. The man simply wanted to punish himself. When they returned to the house, Raymond rushed outside before they had a chance to even step fully out of the car. "I need both of you to try to stay calm," he began, though he blatantly was having difficulty following his own advice. "I think we should all stay outside for a while." "What's going on?" Sam asked, barely resisting the urge to go against Raymond's advice. "I think the evil spirits were waiting for the opportunity to get one of us alone." "Why didn't I consider that?" Meg asked in a self-berating tone. "Why didn't we consider it," Raymond countered. "Since you left to meet Montgomery, the paranormal activity inside the house has been at an all-time peak." "Then we should all go back inside," Sam suggested. "Maybe they won't be so brave with three of us to fight them." "No," Raymond replied, stepping between Sam and the doorway. "I am sensing a strong need to really think this situation through carefully before we go back inside." "I think he's right, Sam," Meg said. "All right. I'll agree not to go back inside for a while if you agree to go on another walk with me," Sam said to Meg. "I wouldn't mind getting a closer look at the pond in the back yard." "That sounds like a lovely idea," she said, walking around the car to place her arm around his arm. Looking at Raymond she asked him, "What will you be doing in the meantime? Surely, you're not planning to go back inside!" "No. I think I need to distance myself from this house even further than either of you. Otherwise, I will risk the possibility of experiencing a PSI overload. Will both of you be okay if I go on a short drive to clear my head?" "Of course," Meg said. "You take all the time you need. When you return, we'll go inside together." Nodding, Raymond added, "Whatever you do, don't go back inside the house without me." He turned and after fishing his keys out of his pocket, stepped into his car.