First few
Here, I have the first few paragraphs of what I've written. If you can, please tell me if I need to improve it, if it's just a little bit, or if it's alot. (I only posted the first few paragraphs to introduce my style of writing, and for evaluation purposes) I should have the whole story finished in a couple of months.
QUANTUM LEAP
NAZI
The story:
Dr. Beckett leaps into the leader Hitler remembrance party in 1964 that are planning to assassinate Jeremy McClellan, a member of an anti-nazi campaign group who are proving a threat to the remaining group of Nazis, who are the members of the Hitler remembrance party. Dr. Beckett has found himself in a position where he is unable to accomplish his mission, which is to save Jeremy from being shot through the head with a sniper rifle at an ANC (Anti Nazi Campaign) conference meeting, as according to the other HR (Hitler Remembrance) members, he must be at his own conference meeting with the rest of the group while the elite firing squad go to annihilate Jeremy McClellan.
This is not the only problem, as the HR leader who merely calls himself ‘Adolf’ (which Al and Gooshie abbreviate to ‘Ado’) assaults Al and escapes the project in search for people that he may use in his group so that he can control the future. So with Sam trying to help out Jeremy, Al and Gooshie trying to locate and capture Ado, and Verbena Beeks, Tina, Sammie Jo and Ziggy are trying to lock on to Sam’s brainwaves, it is obvious that this is going to be one hell of a leap…
The tall, built man wore a dark uniform, the right arm embroidered with a swastika, a thin red band was wrapped around his cap, the band widened at the brim on the front. A plastic open on the hat resembled a swastika also. He swung his arm around to his head in a salute and spoke: “Heil Hii-“ his voice was broke off as electricity began to pulse through his body, and he vanished into an aura of ultra-violet light. In his place was a younger man. He seemed completely disorientated, and began to observe his surroundings. He turned his head and noticed that there were at least fifty people watching him, and that he was stood up on a stage out in the middle of a mansion that was decorated with red tapestries, which embroidered on them in black was a swastika. Dr. Beckett had leaped into a supporter of the Nazis. “Oh, boy.” He muttered under his breath.
One of the Nazis before him shouted to him to ask if there was anything wrong. Dr. Beckett pulled out a small revolver from his pocket and pointed it to the nazi. “If you shout out again in the middle of any of my presentations, I will shoot you.” There was a look of grimace on Sam Beckett’s face, and the expression in his voice was that of anger. Once he’d realised what he’d said, Sam’s face fell, and he apologised to the Nazi for the way he had spoken to him. “S… sorry.”
The nazi replied: “You have no need to be sorry. I should not shout out to you, even in concern, Adolf”. The nazi turned to the group behind him and whispered to them: “We should stick to his rules a little more. I wouldn’t put it past him to shoot us. We must not blow our cover now. He must not find out who we really are.”
“Adolf?” Sam breathed to himself. “Look, the… the”
“Presentation.” one of the Nazis pointed out.
“I have warned you all! Now obey! DO NOT SHOUT OUT!” Sam turned around and began wondering to himself why he treated these people like he did, however evil they are. “Presentation, yeah. The presentation is cancelled.”
There was no reaction in the crowd of Nazis. They just turned around and made their way out of the courtyard. Sam however made his way to the main bedroom, wondering to himself how he knew where everything was around the place.
In the bedroom, He opened the wardrobe to see if he could find some normal clothes. As he rummaged through the wardrobe, he found a small bedside mirror, right in the back of it. He picked it out and flipped the body frame to reveal the mirror. As he looked in the mirror, he felt terribly uneasy. He suddenly felt the guilt of a killer, someone who had completely destroyed thousands and thousands of lives. He saw Adolf Hitler.
:cheers
